infomercials|


Youtube| infomercials| worst infomercials| Youtube| as seen on tv|

The Infomercial| Blues| - A poem|

Hey Richard Simmons
Still Sweatin' to the Oldies?
Seen zumba dancing?
Yosemite Sam
Did you hear it too?
Woke up to the spin a blazin' and a blarin'
Make sure I turn the tv off tonight
Too much talking
Need more dancing
Where's Simmons short shorts
No glitz no glamour
Fat, thin, in between
Pure energy
ENTHUSIASM!
I  can see by example
Words, words, words, words . . .
STOP!
I've got the infomercial| blues

Stop the talk!
Entertainment's what we want!
Flim Flam
Hucksters
Pedaling their wares
Whatever happened to
The haircutting system
Attached to the vacuum
Cut your hair
Straight to the vacuum
Who was the genius?
Replace bowl, scissors method
Cut your whole families hair
What's wrong with looking like a Beatle?
Become a hair stylist, barber, beautician
Floyd, Mayberry RFD are you listening?
No more broom, dustpan
No muss no fuss
I've got the infomercial| blues

Anyone ever really buy
Chia pet head
Instant hair dye
No more water, no more gloves
No more waiting!
Do it yourselfers listen closely
Hair fill-in in a can
Hair replacement system
Audience lined up in rows sitting on chairs
Wearing their best poker faces
Probably sprayed on as well
Here it comes the Talking Show Pony
Spraying Instant Hair
Isn't it really black powdery spray
Hair Shoe Polish in a can
What was that one called?
On one cowlicky spot
Of a well rehearsed scalp
Great results every time
Did they ever do this on Green Acres
What was that guy's name?
I've got the infomercial blues

Make sure you turn the tv off before you fall asleep
Where's the remote?
Tonight I'm setting it to "sleep"
I've got the infomercial| blues
Click
Zzzzzzzz

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About mindfulnesswalks

Publicist| Citizen Journalist| Host| Mindfulness Walks| Virtual Cafe|Poet| Writer| Artist
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